Muni Long’s “Made for Me” reached platinum status, hit the No. 1 spot on R&B/hip-hop radio and, much like her breakthrough groove “Hrs & Hrs,” went viral on TikTok — with users posting hilarious and playful videos to the lyric, “Twin, where have you been?” It was inevitable that the R&B song of the year would be showered with Grammy nominations.
But it didn’t qualify for the 2025 show, technically speaking. The song was released on Sept. 15, 2023, the last day of eligibility for the 2024 Grammys. It was submitted to that show — a risky move that didn’t pay off: The track was too new and didn’t garner any noms.
Muni Long
Long posted about the bad news on social media — a video of herself lying on the floor in distress with the caption: “When management tells you ‘Made for Me’ isn’t eligible for any Grammys.”
But her team regrouped and found a loophole used by artists who came before her: Submit a live version of the song. It wouldn’t qualify in all categories, like song of the year or best R&B song, but it would be eligible for record of the year and best R&B performance — where it indeed landed a nomination. And the Grammy love for the singer — a respected songwriter who has crafted hits for Rihanna, Ariana Grande, Selena Gomez, Madonna and Miranda Lambert — was powerful: She swept the R&B categories, also landing noms for best R&B album (Revenge), R&B song (“Ruined Me”) and traditional R&B performance (“Make Me Forget”).
“The biggest lesson [and] takeaway is you have to be very intentional about what you’re doing, and I think that was the mistake we made. Holistically, I think we weren’t focused. In particular, there were certain people who did not understand that I could have a bigger moment than ‘Hrs and Hrs,’” she says of her song that won the best R&B performance Grammy in 2023. “I will never let that happen to me again. I’ll always make sure we’re taking it seriously. ‘What’s the plan? What are we doing?’ And even if no one else has a plan, I have my own plan.”
Was it a relief when you found out there was a way to submit “Made for Me” for Grammys?
It’s like a fork in the road. I could be grateful that I’m even in the conversation this year. Then there’s the other path: If we weren’t so in disbelief at how massive the song was … I think that we could have had multiple nominations in multiple categories, song of the year possibly.
“Ruined Me” was inspired by your split from your husband of nine years and is nominated for best R&B song. What was it like writing that song?
Literally, it was the last song [I recorded]. I wrote the song in probably 20 minutes. That’s how it always is. If it takes me longer than that, I just need to move on.
Is it easy to write that quickly when you are being vulnerable?
It really doesn’t matter what the subject is — I remove myself from the process. To be honest, I’m not super vulnerable. I might take a piece from my real life, but the rest of it is theater. I want you to feel the emotion that I’m trying to evoke. That’s it. My actual feelings around my current situation is like Michael Myers, Chucky. I’m not going to write a song about that, obviously.
Have you tried?
No. I just wouldn’t because I know that it’s maniacal. You would probably call the police. “Wow. She’s lost it.”
What inspired “Made for Me”?
My son had just been born two months prior and sometimes I’ll just stare off into the corner of the room and be like, “Hmm, what does this make me feel?” And the words start coming out. So that song is about my child, the feelings that I had at that time of like, “Man, I cannot believe that I have a person.”
Were you surprised by the best R&B album nomination since your album hasn’t been out for long?
I went in with the intention of trying to make the best music I could possibly make with the two weeks that I had [in the studio] … so to get that recognition that I made something that was really, really well put together and people really fuck with it, that’s dope. Because sometimes you start to lose hope. Everybody wants to be a musician, everybody wants to do music — that makes me want to do something else. It’s not special. I don’t want to cheapen it, but it’s like you don’t actually have to have skill.
You mean when people are doing it as a hobby or the next hot thing?
Yeah. Like, “Oh, I’m booking studio time today. I’m going to go make me a song,” and then fuck around and the shit blows up. It feels like the Twilight Zone. Like, why am I over here making this expensive-ass music with strings and all this stuff?” I’m actually really trying hard to make something that will stand the test of time, and then here comes this person farting on the track and it’s going crazy. Like, “Am I tripping?” And then you get the acknowledgement from the Academy and from your peers and it’s like, “OK, cool. I wasn’t tripping.”
The title track surprised me because it’s called “Revenge” but you sing the refrain: “Not looking for revenge.” Tell me about writing that.
I always have this bounce-back-quick mentality. I don’t like to be down for too long. Even if I do have a good cry, it is going to last probably about five, 10 minutes max. And after that it’s like, “OK girl, go wash your face, put your makeup on or eat you a little edible or go watch movies or take a nap.” It’s never going to be, “Oh, my God, I’m so sad.” Tiny violin. Never. That’s not in my DNA. It has to do with me never wanting to appear weak. If my legs got blown off, I would fucking crawl on my elbows. I’m a roach. I don’t die.
That’s my essence. It’s like I never give up. And the concept of revenge is like, “I really should be sad right now and this is something that I should probably stop and process and go through all the stages of grief, but I’ll just deal with it when it comes back up later. I really would much rather continue enjoying my life. Fuck you.” It’s probably not the most healthy way to go about things, but that’s how I do it.
Muni Long
The lyric that stuck out the most was, “You know I would’ve died for you/One night I almost did.” Did you write that?
Yes. That was stemming from several true events. I have a dark attitude toward the conversation around domestic violence. And being in an abusive relationship, you realize that there isn’t help, especially with the results of November 6th, it’s even worse now. There is no help for women and children. There really isn’t. There’s the appearance of [help], but when you’re really in that situation, it’s almost like you have to dig deep and dig yourself out of that hole or endure until you can get to a place where you are safe and you are protected, because the world isn’t going to do it.
My best revenge is continuing to be successful, making sure that my platform is so large that when I finally do speak up about certain things, you can’t silence me. You can’t make it seem like I’m crazy. It’s really sad, and it’s even worse now with some of these laws they’re trying to pass. We’re not our mothers. We’re not our grandmothers. We’re not putting up with that shit. So hopefully people are listening to my album and hearing the lyrics and feeling inspired — not feeling like they have to be like, “Oh, woe is me.” Nah, take your power back.
Did winning your first Grammy in 2023 change your life?
Yeah, it definitely makes life easier, but you’re only as good as your latest thing, right? At that time I was like, “Is this real? Is this a joke? I don’t know. Maybe I won because there was no one else better.”
Muni Long
No. Beyoncé was in the category, let’s not forget.
That’s true. Yeah, no, you’re right, I think it was Beyoncé, Jazmine Sullivan, Mary J. Blige, PJ Morton. It was actually insane.
People who have all won Grammys before …
I didn’t even think about that. It’s true. It helps when you’re able to show that it wasn’t a coincidence. It wasn’t a fluke. They thought I got lucky. Historically, whenever I do have success, it’s attributed to the men in my situation, which is annoying, but I’m grateful for the opportunity to continue to show my gift and that the one consistent thing throughout time is that I still have my gift. You can’t take that, so I’m going to continue being successful whether you’re here or not, which is great. Even under duress — I’m going through a lot personally right now, a lot.
If I started talking about it, people would be like, “No fucking way.” But to have something to look at and be like, “This is the reason why we don’t give up. This is the reason why we keep putting everything we have into the music.” Of course, I have my little one. That’s super-inspiring, being mommy to him and making sure that I leave something for him. It’s like, “Just keep going. Stay the course. Be consistent. Be grateful. Stay in your gratitude. Keep your frequency high and good things will happen. Even if there is the appearance of darkness, there’s always a little piece of light.”
Mariah Carey jumped on the “Made for Me” remix and you also co-wrote her 2018 song “A No No.” What was it like working with her again?
It was amazing. I think she is one of the most talented people I’ve ever worked with. Her voice is insane. She’s a brilliant producer, arranger, a vocal producer, songwriter. I don’t think people give her as much credit as they should. She talks about it all the time — about some of her most popular songs, it was just her on the piano, and then she took it to a producer and the producer ended up getting all the credit as if she’s just a pretty face and a pretty voice.
I draw a lot of inspiration from her and her journey, and she’s a wonderful human. I learned so much being in her presence, I can only hope to give someone that same experience later on. For her to take time to actually participate, that’s a huge deal because Mother Mariah don’t play. If she doesn’t think it’s good, she’ll be like, “I don’t know her.”
You’ve written for Sabrina Carpenter, Kelly Clarkson, Mary J. Blige and Florida Georgia Line. Do you want to continue to write for others or focus on your own music?
I want to go where I’m loved and appreciated. I want to go where the joy is. The dumb shit that happens behind the scenes when lawyers and A&Rs and record execs get involved, it’s so unappetizing. It’s like, “Hey, guess what? I’m willing to pull this song and walk away because I don’t want to deal with the headache and the silly shit.” It’s not that complicated.
When I work with artists like John Legend or Mariah, it doesn’t take all that. It’s very simple. All the extra shit that comes with it, that means that someone is trying to devalue you or finesse you out of something. I don’t want no parts of that.
Muni Long
It makes me think about how tough it must be for songwriters who aren’t also performers.
It’s hell. Why do you think I stopped? I said, “Oh, no, there has to be another way, honey, because this ain’t it.”
During the writers strike in TV and film, there were a lot of people who said streaming paid them in pennies. Was that the case for you?
Absolutely. Sometimes you look at your quarterly statement and you’re like, “Oh wow, $1,000 for 500 million streams. Great. That’s awesome.” The sheer volume that I have to write in order to make an income that makes sense [is insane]. What saved me is that I have quality and quantity, whereas some of these people, all they have is one or two records. And I had to take a lot of Ls. And I got taken advantage of and stolen from and all that.
You mean not getting credit for something?
Not getting credit, not getting paid, the producer running off with the money — anything you can think of, it happened to me. But my goal was to be where I am now, and those people who did those things to me are nowhere to be found.
This story appeared in the Nov. 20 issue of The Hollywood Reporter magazine. Click here to subscribe.
