Jen Atkin, hairstylist to the stars and owner of OUAI, is one of the hundreds of Los Angeles residents affected by the current onslaught of wildfires.
Over the last several hours, Atkin has used her platform on Instagram to share the aftermath.
On Tuesday, January 7, Atkin evacuated the home she shared with her husband, kids, and dogs. Now, she’s asking for advice.
“I will take any advice you have on how to explain to this kids that we won’t be going home,” Atkin asked her followers.
“My babies beds and blankets and stuffed animals are here,” she said along with a photo of the rubble that was once her home.
It’s a conversation so many are having this week amidst the devastation.
According to Ashley Etheridge and Dandelion Family Counseling, it’s important to only “share just enough information.”
“If a child witnesses a fire, or the aftermath of a fire, it can be helpful to only share brief, factual, age-appropriate information,” Etheridge writes. “Children need a way understand scary or confusing news and integrate it into their brains.”
In addition to sharing what is necessary with your children, Etheridge adds that a parent should “validate” their children’s feelings.
“Validating a child’s feelings is always important. This creates safety and connection. You could reflect, ‘Learning news about a fire can be scary. My job as a parent is to keep you safe.’”
It can also be helpful to give your child purpose by helping out those in the community affected by the tragedy, Etheridge writes.
“Sometimes children and individuals can feel powerless after a fire.” By making donations or bringing the fire fighters food and water can help kids “regain some sense of safety and control.”
The International Association of Fire Fighters also iterates the importance of keeping as normal a schedule as possible for the kids.
“In chaotic or emotional times, it is critical for your child that you stay consistent with mundane routines, such as pick-up and drop-off schedules and family meals,” the IAFF reports, adding that giving children even more of your time and attention can be helpful as they cope.
“These rituals help convey a sense of normalcy to your child and send the message, ‘Even though this tragedy occurred, I am still here for you and your world is not changing.’”
And the City of Petaluma suggests encouraging kids to talk about what they are feeling.
“Let children talk about the disaster and ask questions as much as they want. Encourage children to describe what they’re feeling. Listen to what they say.”
And it’s important to stay together.
“While you look for housing and assistance, you may want to leave your children with relatives or friends. Instead, keep the family together as much as possible and make children a part of what you are doing to get the family back on its feet,” the City of Petaluma reports.
“Children get anxious, and they’ll worry that their parents won’t return.”
Check the LAFD website for local wildfire alerts and click here for resources on how to help those affected.
