A Prayer for the New Year? You Might Want to Try It

For the most part, the people who are drawn to my work are drawn to my approach. And certainly there were some people who were ambivalent about prayer or had a negative association, but I do think that any place we are in resistance, that’s something interesting to look at.

I love the concept in the book that we’re co-creating our life through prayer rather than life just being something that happens to us. It’s such a beautiful way to frame prayer as something that changes our internal dialogue, so the way that we talk to ourselves can help create the reality we want.

Yes, exactly. It’s a way to think about how we are co-creating with life instead of a more victimized perspective that life is happening to us. Of course, victimization is a very real thing, but it can also be a mindset.

You utilize somatic therapy with your clients as well. How is somatic therapy and prayer linked in your practice?

I utilize a modality called focusing. We go into the body in a meditative state, and we’re just present with any physical sensations that are arising. And it’s like parts work, like internal family systems. We all have these different parts that have their own memories. They have their own consciousness. It’s frequently where we’ll encounter our inner children. And so it’s a way of shining a light on those parts of ourselves and being with the physical sensations that come with them, building more awareness. And it’s a way to improve distress tolerance and emotional regulation, because a lot of times, these are the parts that are running the show subconsciously.

What do you recommend when the negative spiral of thoughts is too overwhelming to be counteracted by the positive intention of prayer?

I work with complex-trauma survivors. A negative view of the self and a negative worldview are two common traits of complex-trauma survivors. I have personal experience with that as well. There’s no shortage of things to feel negative, overwhelmed, despairing about. One place to start is how that’s presenting in your life. When are you noticing the negative thoughts? Is there a trigger? Is it a time of day? Is it a certain event? And then starting to get curious with where is that connected in my body?